Professional hazard

That post on procrastination that I promised you? This is it. Right now, I'm putting off grading 23 quizzes, writing two grant proposals, and reading for class. I expect the reading to be lovely, since it's Real Literature and not theory, but I'm saving it for last as a motivator to get the other stuff done. It's not working that well....

You know as well as I do that there are always lots of good reasons to procrastinate. You're using my blog to procrastinate right now, aren't you? And I'm sure you have good reasons for that. When I started graduate school, I foolishly believed that I would be better at getting things done, organizing my time, etc. because it seemed like there was no way to do everything that was being asked of me otherwise. Little did I know that assignments in grad school are a lot like playing chicken. It's taken me three years, but I am now approaching the steely resolve of Kevin Bacon in Footloose. I'm not going to be the one to steer my tractor off the road. In case you have no idea what I mean:



The biggest reason for this is that the culture of the academy does not in any way, shape, or form cultivate advanced planning. In fact, I would argue that it actively discourages such silliness. A real-life example: I wanted to plan what courses I would take over the four semesters I spent getting my M.A. so I could file some paper work with the graduate school as instructed in the graduate student handbook, but curriculum was changed and course offerings for the next semester weren't decided on until the week before registration opened. I once took the initiative and read ahead in a class, only to have the professor change the syllabus by eliminating half of the reading I'd already done.

This is even worse when it comes to funding decisions - competitions for grants and fellowships are announced anywhere from one to three weeks before the deadline, but decisions take much longer. This is annoying when you're waiting to find out whether you'll have $2,000 or $5,000 to get you through the summer. It is excruciating when you're waiting to find out whether you need to book a ticket to Europe for a research institute or if you can agree to attend a wedding or if you can reasonably plan an anniversary vacation.

The stress and anxiety of the summer funding cycle have given me a lot of trouble these past few years, so I'm really enjoying the poetic justice of the situation in my department right now. See, our building is slated for interior renovation, which it sort of does need (though not nearly as desperately as some administrators would have you believe). This renovation depends on funding the university may or may not receive from the governor, funding we will find out about sooner or later. Meanwhile, though, they've scheduled the move out of our offices and into "swing spaces" (or dungeons) for the last week of spring semester, and today they sent an email reminding us that:

We still don't know one way or the other about whether the renovation will be going forward, but in any case, spring break would be a good time to organize & purge your offices.

Let me clarify this for you: we might not be moving at all, but we'd like you to use your vacation to get ready anyways. You know, as a favor to us.

Someone needs to learn about motivating employees. The only way I'm going to do this over break (or maybe at all) is if I have a bunch of other stuff I want to do even less.